I feel so unstable sometimes. Or all the time.
I'm happy then sad. Then happy and sad.
I know everyone goes through this all the time, prob. Just like me,
but it just feels so unhealthy and I get stuck.
I just can't stand it.
I really just don't know what i'm feeling or thinking or doing these days.
It's not a comforting feeling. I need rest. And break...
:/
Thursday, November 19, 2009
Sunday, September 27, 2009
Are you willing to take a walk?
Because then God will do the rest. :)
Just typed up my last update letter about hampton beach that i've been meaning to do for a long while. But I guess it was just in my heart now. Let me know if you want my updates from the summer and I can easily e-mail it! I love you all. Here are some thoughts in my head...
I think i'm going to try to go over what i've learned this summer and do little devotional blogs to keep up. Let's see how this goes! Feel free to follow! :)
From the end of project reflection...
2 peter 1:3-5
Making One's Calling and Election Sure
3His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness. 4Through these he has given us his very great and precious promises, so that through them you may participate in the divine nature and escape the corruption in the world caused by evil desires.5For this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge;
"You never know what God is going to do."
"God doesn't call the qualified, he qualifies the called."
"THIS is the cream of the crop. in God's kingdom."
motivated, passionate, in love with God.
Lust can destroy. Passion needs to be controlled.
His divine power has given us everything we need for a Godly life through our knowledge of Him who called us by His own glory and goodness.
"What I use to desire, I no longer desire."
THIS POWER is able to change us!
You let go and the power turns off.
STAY connected to God. The power is through Him.
It takes power to stand.
2 peter1:5-9
5For this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; 6and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; 7and to godliness, brotherly kindness; and to brotherly kindness, love. 8For if you possess these qualities in increasing measure, they will keep you from being ineffective and unproductive in your knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. 9But if anyone does not have them, he is nearsighted and blind, and has forgotten that he has been cleansed from his past sins.
powers need to be unlocked. and disciplined! needs to be motivated and committed!
Romans 8:5
5Those who live according to the sinful nature have their minds set on what that nature desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires.
Watch what I eat,
and take time to eat.
There is a spiritual battle going on. Share it with someone. Don't keep it a secret.
Secrecy will kill me.
"Make every effort to confirm your calling and election. For if you do these things, you will never stumble." 2 Peter 1:10
I keep on praying to get my passions under control and give them to my God and to be motivated and committed. I pray to surrender totally and love and give grace like He does! I want to love like I loved on project. I want to love with the heart of God. I pray for this. I feel like I'm on the verge of slipping and I don't want to. I need to cling to God. I feel like quietism can totally take over if I don't fight in this battle. With my sword.
Okay, hopefully this feels so good that it will get me motivated to get back into my word. Get back into this life and do as God allows and calls.
<3
Just typed up my last update letter about hampton beach that i've been meaning to do for a long while. But I guess it was just in my heart now. Let me know if you want my updates from the summer and I can easily e-mail it! I love you all. Here are some thoughts in my head...
I think i'm going to try to go over what i've learned this summer and do little devotional blogs to keep up. Let's see how this goes! Feel free to follow! :)
From the end of project reflection...
2 peter 1:3-5
Making One's Calling and Election Sure
3His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness. 4Through these he has given us his very great and precious promises, so that through them you may participate in the divine nature and escape the corruption in the world caused by evil desires.5For this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge;
"You never know what God is going to do."
"God doesn't call the qualified, he qualifies the called."
"THIS is the cream of the crop. in God's kingdom."
motivated, passionate, in love with God.
Lust can destroy. Passion needs to be controlled.
His divine power has given us everything we need for a Godly life through our knowledge of Him who called us by His own glory and goodness.
"What I use to desire, I no longer desire."
THIS POWER is able to change us!
You let go and the power turns off.
STAY connected to God. The power is through Him.
It takes power to stand.
2 peter1:5-9
5For this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; 6and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; 7and to godliness, brotherly kindness; and to brotherly kindness, love. 8For if you possess these qualities in increasing measure, they will keep you from being ineffective and unproductive in your knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. 9But if anyone does not have them, he is nearsighted and blind, and has forgotten that he has been cleansed from his past sins.
powers need to be unlocked. and disciplined! needs to be motivated and committed!
Romans 8:5
5Those who live according to the sinful nature have their minds set on what that nature desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires.
Watch what I eat,
and take time to eat.
There is a spiritual battle going on. Share it with someone. Don't keep it a secret.
Secrecy will kill me.
"Make every effort to confirm your calling and election. For if you do these things, you will never stumble." 2 Peter 1:10
I keep on praying to get my passions under control and give them to my God and to be motivated and committed. I pray to surrender totally and love and give grace like He does! I want to love like I loved on project. I want to love with the heart of God. I pray for this. I feel like I'm on the verge of slipping and I don't want to. I need to cling to God. I feel like quietism can totally take over if I don't fight in this battle. With my sword.
Okay, hopefully this feels so good that it will get me motivated to get back into my word. Get back into this life and do as God allows and calls.
<3
Saturday, July 11, 2009
Fighting the Battle with my Sword
“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.”
Galatians 5:22-23
Galatians 5:22-23
I've been memorizing this verse this morning! Project has been amazing and i can't even believe the ways every thought and action i have that isn't Christ-like is being convicted. And I can't believe the growth that i've felt in myself that is sometimes hard to see until it gets pointed out from a brother or sister in Christ.
I can't believe that it is the end of week 6, ohmygoshers insane. And so far at project, i should prob add more details but so much has happened since i've last even had the time to blog! But now i am just so excited and so on fire, i cant help but blog. Plus my journal is totally getting filled up like crazy and I use it like every second to put my prayers, notes and thoughts down. But with working almost 35-40 hours a week at dunkin donuts i've realized i'm going to meet and work and be around people who i want to be friends where it isn't easy. Things happen in people's lives and people are different and you just never know, some are grumpy, or struggling with things, others don't care, others joke and pretend to be mean, but i learned once from a friend that pointed me to the Bible something that i always remember! "I hate mean people.""You know what you gotta do? You just gotta love them even more." Thank you friend. :) So, the spirit in me has been pointing out my attitude and my thoughts and feelings/emotions towards things at work and its just been real and genuine and intense.
Other than that, being associate project director and being challenged with this role this summer is just awestriking completely. Like i never would've imagined really being called to this position especially in a house with so many women and men of God. I first thought to myself, how can this be? Me? little ol' weak me who has so much more to grow? But God has used me in so many ways already, and i fight hard because i want it (even though i can and will fight harder for it) and also God passes wisdom onto me as I seek Him more and more. And if He challenged me, then I am right for this and i will love it and embrace it and trust God completely with it and know that it's not me on my own doing this but my decision to live in this role this summer by faith and trust.
Last night, we went to a concert and everyone who went rededicated their lives to Christ. including me! I was convicted of wanting to be in my Bible but not really taking the steps and desires that I needed to fulfill this and DO IT. But from the lyrics of the rappers hip hop Semaj, songs', i learned that IT IS A BATTLE. AND I NEED MY SWORD (Bible) or else how am i going to do it?? I need it. Especially when i'm asking God to show me these things that i need Him to work through with me on so i can be more and more like Him and have a bigger and better heart like His. And i went to work today at 6 am and i still made it a point to read my Bible. And when it got tough at work today, i realized it in time, prayed about it and said, i need my sword! And i made a connection with a co-worker that I love, Jenniffer who was just broken today. When are we not? And also told my co-worker Jose who picks on me a lot that i've been praying for Him so that we can be friends.
God, work in me. Continue working in me. You have blessed me with using me to help lead 5 people to come to Christ. 5 real new brothers and sisters in Christ. And I pray that you work in their lives and bring them closer to You more than our little conversation that You were completely in control of did to them. I pray that you continue to use us even though You don't have to! I pray that you use me to share Your love and Your light with my co-workers by helping me to live by the spirit completely and just surrender to You, Lord. I pray that the rest of hbsp does not fly by and that we can cherish and embrace and grab every single moment left. I love You. Thanks for being You. Thanks for loving me and everyone like You do. Unconditionally.
exxxxxcited for outreach today! :)
Love,
Christina
Friday, June 19, 2009
I'm here for a reason
It's so weird that there's so much going on here.
I think God has definitely been showing me I'm here for a reason.
Or many reasons.
I'm just so glad that even though its hard and challenging and everything,
I am confident in my trust in God's plan for me.
Praying and praying. I feel like i'm turning into a prayer warrior.
Which i want to be. Please pray for our project unity and outreaches everyday.
Oh, Hampton Beach.
I think God has definitely been showing me I'm here for a reason.
Or many reasons.
I'm just so glad that even though its hard and challenging and everything,
I am confident in my trust in God's plan for me.
Praying and praying. I feel like i'm turning into a prayer warrior.
Which i want to be. Please pray for our project unity and outreaches everyday.
Oh, Hampton Beach.
Friday, June 12, 2009
Welcome to Hampton Beach! :)
Christina Teng21 F Street
Hampton Beach, NH 03842
snail mail me :)
WOW. Has it been almost two weeks already?!
Being in Hampton Beach is nothing like I expected.
I actually don't even know if I had expectations at all.
I just know that God was leading me here to give up my summer to Him and ask Him to use me to share my love and my faith for Him. I will try to blog and update often so if you're interested, I would love to hear comments, questions, prayers and anything else!!! especially love! :)
THE WHITE GULL.
This is our home for the summer for all 42 students and some staff members! It's cozy and i'm in love with it already!I feel like i've made so many new friends and that we'e definitely known each other for more than just a little less than 2 weeks! There are 3 floors and I live upstairs in the "penthouse" sharing a room with Camellia, Jen and Kelsey! :) It's like a mini apartment with a balcony and our own kitchen an living room. We also have a lobby that the whole house hangs out in and gets to know each other!!PROJECT.
So, I guess like many, I knew I was going to be here to grow my faith and share my faith with others but God has already been blowing me away like crazy. We've been so busy with hardly any time to relax, but I love it. Everyone's been job hunting and getting to know each other, grocery shopping and working on continuing support. (Thank you for my supporters, please let me know if God is leading you to support if you haven't already or support even more because I have not reached my required amount for this summer yet! Trusting in God.) But we also have a jampacked schedule like everyday with things to do! On Monday nights we have a weekly team meeting, then other nights we have community groups where we do outreaches, have Bible studies and have fellowship time. We also have women's time night which is my favorite because we really get to learn and spend time with God and hearing about His word how to be women of God, and women that God made us to be. It's a good reflection time also to spend time with Him to get to know Him better and just be in His word. The Bible is so awesome, if you haven't spent a lot of time reading it, just flip it open and I just encourage you to read anything!! It'll blow you away how well God knows us and what we're going through and how He teaches us how to live in the best way.
BOSTON DAY.
We also went to Boston to talk to people and meet people and see the city! It was awesome. On the T - which is the train, I got to talk to a nice lady Rosa about life and she was so thankful for the conversation, it was soooo cute.
MY NEW JOB.
Dunkin' Donuts all the way!! Another important part of our project is to learn how to minister and witness to people we work with in the workplace, so we get jobs to also meet people and learn about others and just love on people. Which I love. I love Dunkin Donuts! I've met so many new people and they're a lot of fun!! It's mindblowing how God has been using me already to just have spiritual conversations at all. Sometimes I feel like it's hard or awkward but it's really not. I love to share what makes me who I am today, being a follower of Jesus and believing He died for our sins so that we can live and know God. I've met Rachel who I can't wait to hang out with! And also went lobster shopping with my co-worker Jo. Then I got to share lobster with the house!
The people here are awesome. I love it. I don't know what exactly God has in store for me but I know that I am growing closer to Him with each day and it is what I desire with all my heart. Thank you for being a part of my team and reading my updates. Please help me pray for my focus to remain on Jesus and how amazing He is. Also to not get distracted and just for my heart to continue to break for the lost, as Jesus says He is the way, the truth and the life. Please pray for God to watch over and heal my friend Robyn who is not well and to be with her in comfort. Please pray for God to be present here in Hampton Beach and move people's hearts for Him.
Love from Hampton!
Monday, May 11, 2009
Life is awesome.
This has been my BEST semester yet at college.
And I feel like this is how College is meant to be.
I did not go out to get drunk once at all, and it's not the not doing that, but it's having more fun or just as fun with real people and spending time with friends and really getting to know people and love people and be able to be sad now and begin to miss them already that is the best part. I didn't know college like this. this real.
God has done so much through me and in me, I am so thankful.
I am thankful I desired to grow my faith in Him and that He has given me so much happiness, satisfaction and genuine life, love and friends in return. Life is definitely different. in a great way!
This has definitely been the BEST semester and time of my life YET. :)
And walking with Jesus and growing in my faith, I can only imagine it getting better and better!
Thank you everyone who has been a part of my semester!
So excited for summer!!!! And just life!!!!!!!
And I feel like this is how College is meant to be.
I did not go out to get drunk once at all, and it's not the not doing that, but it's having more fun or just as fun with real people and spending time with friends and really getting to know people and love people and be able to be sad now and begin to miss them already that is the best part. I didn't know college like this. this real.
God has done so much through me and in me, I am so thankful.
I am thankful I desired to grow my faith in Him and that He has given me so much happiness, satisfaction and genuine life, love and friends in return. Life is definitely different. in a great way!
This has definitely been the BEST semester and time of my life YET. :)
And walking with Jesus and growing in my faith, I can only imagine it getting better and better!
Thank you everyone who has been a part of my semester!
So excited for summer!!!! And just life!!!!!!!
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
God's good to us.
I feel like God is good to us.
I know it but I don't always feel it.
But I feel it for now. I enjoy that because lately this early past weekend and a few of the days last week I didn't always feel like this. I felt kind of like I just didn't feel like I loved God enough or was a good enough Christian or something of that sort. I just felt like I could do better. I don't know if that was conviction or just a way to bring me closer to God really. But I definitely think that after I prayed for that it happened this weekend! But not til the end.
I got baptized this weekend :)
I was having a really rough Sunday morning. I went home to meet people at Church but on the way picked up my brother with my sis and her bf(he went the 1st time to church with us!) and everything was just going wrong this morning and everything my brother said seemed to just not be supportive somehow but i knew he didnt mean it. I ended up being a mess and not in a good state to meet the people that the intern i've been in touch with at the Church had asked to meet me and gathered, which was kind of him. So, it was emotional and i broke down at church and felt like I wasn't being a good Christian and trusting in God because I was so discouraged and getting affected by everything. But a stranger lady in the bathroom, Michelle, prayed with me to trust in God. and be able to grow closer to Him through whatever was bringing me down. When i went back into the service, i realized it was a baptism splash, long story short, God told me to trust in Him and rely on Him again and be truthful about my life and that yes, i couldn't be perfect and all ready and the good happy Christian girl i wanted to be today to meet the potential supporters. I don't know where it'll come from, but I know I just have to leave it up to God and keep trying and not feel like I'm failing because that would not be trusting Him. I spontaneously got baptized today!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :) I needed that for God and for me and God. And also Brian got baptized and we dovoted more of ourselves and our hearts to Jesus. It was amazing to do that together as well!
My grandma and grandpa are coming to Heaven!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
After Church, I told my parents and they were kind of eh about it because I had been baptized. But I was totally reliant on God again and reminded to give myself completely to Him. I need to be in the Word more so I don't have to remind myself of this! But I went to hang out with my grandparents and they have been on my heart! But we ended up talking about my grandma's eye and how it's hard for her to see and open her eyes. Then she talked about dying and heaven and hell and it just led in to God talk. and how to get to heaven. My grandma said she didnt know if she was going, and no one knew until after. But I got to share the great GOOD NEWS with her and my grandpa and it made sense to them. They told me about how they believe Jesus saved them and how he died for us! And my grandma even started to tell me about the Bible stories and moses and jesus' birth and adam and eve and the disciples, lots! It was awesome hearing!!!!! THEN WE PRAYED TOGETHER holding hands to make sure we knew that we were all going to Heaven together! And that we knew Jesus is our savior! IT WAS AMAZING! The explaining part of the good news was hard because I kept forgetting how to say GOD, JESUS, and HEAVEN in chinese. Lol, the 3 crucial words. So, I was speaking chinglish, chinese and english. But it was just so greatttttttttttttttttttttttttttt.
I'm committing to reading my Bible everyday. I need God in my life.
From Chelsie McNeil, Thanks girl.
Some words of encouragement:
“If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be given you.” –John 15:7
---Pretty sweet promises He has for us :)
Trusting in Him,
Christina
p.s. support raising is such hard work to do, but it's kind of fun as well and enjoyable. i just know it's all up to God to provide it and not me.
p.s.s. today my grandma did keep calling me "dumb" when she found out how much money I needed to raise for support. i don't think she understands that part and i don't think i did a good enough job explaining because of the slight language barrier, my chinese can get pretty rough, but it wasn't as discouraging as it could've been because i was explaining to her why i knew it was a lot but God was big enough for that.
goodnight.
I know it but I don't always feel it.
But I feel it for now. I enjoy that because lately this early past weekend and a few of the days last week I didn't always feel like this. I felt kind of like I just didn't feel like I loved God enough or was a good enough Christian or something of that sort. I just felt like I could do better. I don't know if that was conviction or just a way to bring me closer to God really. But I definitely think that after I prayed for that it happened this weekend! But not til the end.
I got baptized this weekend :)
I was having a really rough Sunday morning. I went home to meet people at Church but on the way picked up my brother with my sis and her bf(he went the 1st time to church with us!) and everything was just going wrong this morning and everything my brother said seemed to just not be supportive somehow but i knew he didnt mean it. I ended up being a mess and not in a good state to meet the people that the intern i've been in touch with at the Church had asked to meet me and gathered, which was kind of him. So, it was emotional and i broke down at church and felt like I wasn't being a good Christian and trusting in God because I was so discouraged and getting affected by everything. But a stranger lady in the bathroom, Michelle, prayed with me to trust in God. and be able to grow closer to Him through whatever was bringing me down. When i went back into the service, i realized it was a baptism splash, long story short, God told me to trust in Him and rely on Him again and be truthful about my life and that yes, i couldn't be perfect and all ready and the good happy Christian girl i wanted to be today to meet the potential supporters. I don't know where it'll come from, but I know I just have to leave it up to God and keep trying and not feel like I'm failing because that would not be trusting Him. I spontaneously got baptized today!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :) I needed that for God and for me and God. And also Brian got baptized and we dovoted more of ourselves and our hearts to Jesus. It was amazing to do that together as well!
My grandma and grandpa are coming to Heaven!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
After Church, I told my parents and they were kind of eh about it because I had been baptized. But I was totally reliant on God again and reminded to give myself completely to Him. I need to be in the Word more so I don't have to remind myself of this! But I went to hang out with my grandparents and they have been on my heart! But we ended up talking about my grandma's eye and how it's hard for her to see and open her eyes. Then she talked about dying and heaven and hell and it just led in to God talk. and how to get to heaven. My grandma said she didnt know if she was going, and no one knew until after. But I got to share the great GOOD NEWS with her and my grandpa and it made sense to them. They told me about how they believe Jesus saved them and how he died for us! And my grandma even started to tell me about the Bible stories and moses and jesus' birth and adam and eve and the disciples, lots! It was awesome hearing!!!!! THEN WE PRAYED TOGETHER holding hands to make sure we knew that we were all going to Heaven together! And that we knew Jesus is our savior! IT WAS AMAZING! The explaining part of the good news was hard because I kept forgetting how to say GOD, JESUS, and HEAVEN in chinese. Lol, the 3 crucial words. So, I was speaking chinglish, chinese and english. But it was just so greatttttttttttttttttttttttttttt.
I'm committing to reading my Bible everyday. I need God in my life.
From Chelsie McNeil, Thanks girl.
Some words of encouragement:
“If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be given you.” –John 15:7
---Pretty sweet promises He has for us :)
Trusting in Him,
Christina
p.s. support raising is such hard work to do, but it's kind of fun as well and enjoyable. i just know it's all up to God to provide it and not me.
p.s.s. today my grandma did keep calling me "dumb" when she found out how much money I needed to raise for support. i don't think she understands that part and i don't think i did a good enough job explaining because of the slight language barrier, my chinese can get pretty rough, but it wasn't as discouraging as it could've been because i was explaining to her why i knew it was a lot but God was big enough for that.
goodnight.
Sunday, April 12, 2009
Thanks Jesus :)
The meaning of Easter...
This is the first year ever that I really understood Easter.
I am so thankful Jesus died for us and suffered for us.
He even knew he had to and had to go through the pain of crucifixion.
(I watched The Passion movie this weekend, how fitting.)
I was a little scared but I am so glad I did!!!!
I feel like I am satisfied with life.
And I will try to "do work" to be this close to God all the time.
Thank you God. Thank you Jesus for dying for us, even us today.
I had an absolutely wonderful Easter weekend at home.
I am crazy in love with my entire family.
(It's taken a lot of ups and downs and separation and heartbreak and tough times and happy times to get here. to get to this much love within my family, but it was all worth it for how i feel for them! It's hard work also but it amazes me to enjoy us all together or not even all together but i've realized it doesn't matter what we have as long as we can lift each other up and be in life together and NEED each other. I feel stressed a lot sometimes when I feel like i have to be the light in the family but as everyone tries to do their part, i also know that it is necessary and fun and reward-ful. I look up to my parents so much for how hard they work for sometimes, very little. We've come so far despite the tough or angry or sad or unbearable or whatever times. I love them all. P.S. I think having a lot taken away from our family makes me so much more grateful for what we do have! It's hard to see that in the eye of the storm.)
I love my friends a ton.
And I love to share God's love with my friends and family.
And I feel happy.
...even if I have to cram for an exam now to try to do well
because I spent all weekend with friends and family nonstop and Church.
I'm so ready to be on top of my work, get things done,
and spend more time with God. And get excited for summer project!
So, i absolutely love this life.
And overall, I'm just thankful! also for who Jesus has changed me to be today.
Happy Easter!
This is the first year ever that I really understood Easter.
I am so thankful Jesus died for us and suffered for us.
He even knew he had to and had to go through the pain of crucifixion.
(I watched The Passion movie this weekend, how fitting.)
I was a little scared but I am so glad I did!!!!
I feel like I am satisfied with life.
And I will try to "do work" to be this close to God all the time.
Thank you God. Thank you Jesus for dying for us, even us today.
I had an absolutely wonderful Easter weekend at home.
I am crazy in love with my entire family.
(It's taken a lot of ups and downs and separation and heartbreak and tough times and happy times to get here. to get to this much love within my family, but it was all worth it for how i feel for them! It's hard work also but it amazes me to enjoy us all together or not even all together but i've realized it doesn't matter what we have as long as we can lift each other up and be in life together and NEED each other. I feel stressed a lot sometimes when I feel like i have to be the light in the family but as everyone tries to do their part, i also know that it is necessary and fun and reward-ful. I look up to my parents so much for how hard they work for sometimes, very little. We've come so far despite the tough or angry or sad or unbearable or whatever times. I love them all. P.S. I think having a lot taken away from our family makes me so much more grateful for what we do have! It's hard to see that in the eye of the storm.)
I love my friends a ton.
And I love to share God's love with my friends and family.
And I feel happy.
...even if I have to cram for an exam now to try to do well
because I spent all weekend with friends and family nonstop and Church.
I'm so ready to be on top of my work, get things done,
and spend more time with God. And get excited for summer project!
So, i absolutely love this life.
And overall, I'm just thankful! also for who Jesus has changed me to be today.
Happy Easter!
Tuesday, April 7, 2009
Reminder:
God wants to be with us.
Even when things aren't all happy and are bad.
Have I not commanded you? Be Strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.
Joshua 1:9
And when things get tough, God wants us to go to Him.
"its not easy... its just reminding ourselves in the midst of feeling alone.. that God completely knows what your feeling and going through... and lately God has been teaching me that.... he is God over my feelings too. over my emotions even....and learning how to surrender even my feelings to him and rely on him in the super happy moments...and the low moments knowing he is sovereign. yeah...I know... and it is hard....especially when we feel its too much to handle or bare... but thats why it is so important that we go to God... cause he reminds us of the truth....because our feelings can make us forget... we totally rely on our feelings so much... we forget that God will not let us go through more than we can bare.. we wants so badly for us to cling to him to ask him for things.... to neeeeed him" - my friend <3
And God puts friends in our lives to bring us back to Him.
A friend loves at all times
Proverbs 17:17
Tonight I think I just crashed. Someone once told me that Satan attacks those of us who are a threat to him. I can't believe I let him get me, but then again I can. Thankfully our God is so powerful, we won't stay down. Talking to my friend tonight and thinking about my struggles and periods of lowness with Alcohol and trying to save him from it was tough, God. But I know that it's not solely up to me to keep him away from obstacles from God. We learn on our own and we learn how to lean on God. But then right after that talking to my family, and just feeling angry towards our family situation and troubles and not being able to do anything but help just felt worse. I felt angry at life for making me sad and helpless. I felt alone for not knowing who to go to about it. I should've went straight to God but it's so easy to not open my Bible when I know it has answers in it and words from God, who already knows what we are feeling and going through in our lives. But thank God for friends who just led me back to Him and reminded me of how GREAT HE IS. and how He wants us to go to Him. If I let the Holy spirit lead me tonight I would have just listened to my sister talk about my family at home and bring it to God and pray about it instead of getting angry and yelling with her for being angry as well. If only, but I was reminded, wasn't i? At one point I thought to myself that I just wanted to be in Heaven already!! And that I hate when things are tough. But God still has a purpose for us in this life. Reminder: God is everything to me.
Even when things aren't all happy and are bad.
Have I not commanded you? Be Strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.
Joshua 1:9
And when things get tough, God wants us to go to Him.
"its not easy... its just reminding ourselves in the midst of feeling alone.. that God completely knows what your feeling and going through... and lately God has been teaching me that.... he is God over my feelings too. over my emotions even....and learning how to surrender even my feelings to him and rely on him in the super happy moments...and the low moments knowing he is sovereign. yeah...I know... and it is hard....especially when we feel its too much to handle or bare... but thats why it is so important that we go to God... cause he reminds us of the truth....because our feelings can make us forget... we totally rely on our feelings so much... we forget that God will not let us go through more than we can bare.. we wants so badly for us to cling to him to ask him for things.... to neeeeed him" - my friend <3
And God puts friends in our lives to bring us back to Him.
A friend loves at all times
Proverbs 17:17
Tonight I think I just crashed. Someone once told me that Satan attacks those of us who are a threat to him. I can't believe I let him get me, but then again I can. Thankfully our God is so powerful, we won't stay down. Talking to my friend tonight and thinking about my struggles and periods of lowness with Alcohol and trying to save him from it was tough, God. But I know that it's not solely up to me to keep him away from obstacles from God. We learn on our own and we learn how to lean on God. But then right after that talking to my family, and just feeling angry towards our family situation and troubles and not being able to do anything but help just felt worse. I felt angry at life for making me sad and helpless. I felt alone for not knowing who to go to about it. I should've went straight to God but it's so easy to not open my Bible when I know it has answers in it and words from God, who already knows what we are feeling and going through in our lives. But thank God for friends who just led me back to Him and reminded me of how GREAT HE IS. and how He wants us to go to Him. If I let the Holy spirit lead me tonight I would have just listened to my sister talk about my family at home and bring it to God and pray about it instead of getting angry and yelling with her for being angry as well. If only, but I was reminded, wasn't i? At one point I thought to myself that I just wanted to be in Heaven already!! And that I hate when things are tough. But God still has a purpose for us in this life. Reminder: God is everything to me.
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
More than enough for me...<3
God, you alone are worthy.
No matter how hard things get,
how much we don't understand,
how much we want to give up at time,
how exhausted we become day to day,
or even how happy and excited we are,
or how much we want to praise and thank you,
God, i could not live day to day without my eyes on you.
Spring break was amazing. I was able to go on BigBreak with Campus Crusade for Christ again this year but this year I really felt the Holy Spirit fill me up and desired it so bad. Salisbury and UMD Cru loves really, I thank you all, I thank you for loving me honestly and completely. And I thank you all for the best time of my life just falling more deeply in love with the Lord our father, worshipping my heart out and letting God fill me up and just sharing God's love with others with me. It was lifechanging and I can't wait for this change to be brought back to our campus and this love, which I already feel is happening!! And I've met so many Christian friends that I am just so in love with them and their love for YOU.
I don't know why I don't feel all the time that You are more than enough for me. When I really do believe it all the time. Sometimes I really do have to rely on my faith more than my emotions. And that's really tough. But I know I could not live without You to trust in.
Thank You God for my new found sheep friends,
I praise Your power and Your love for also letting me help bring them back to You.
For using me to invest into their lives and just completely love them.
God, I thank You for Brian and Robyn in my life and for the encouragement and hope You have given me through these past weeks. Thank You for giving me a purpose and a passion to serve You and share Your love with others and everyone.
"When we become Christians, it's not that we begin to worshipl it's that we restore worship to its original design. We reboot our lives with the process of being saturated with God." Rick James
I'm reading fantasy right now, bits and pieces to just fill me up with God. I need it so bad all the time, to be filled up. He is the best thing to be saturated with. Better than fear, worry, greed, activity, lust, emptiness, loneliness, or even alcohol. says Rick and I agree.
Worship means "saturation'.
Being saturate with the presence of God, we overflow back to God
in praise, service, thanksgiving, singing, loving, caring, time, so on...
Us pouring ourselves into God and Him pouring Himself back into us-He refills us.
And basically like a sponge, if we fill ourselves up, we're just going to overflow!
That's what God wants. :)
Today, I want to pray especially and lift up all those who are having trouble being filled with God and the Holy Spirit, who are being tested or attacked by Satan, and just everyone in need of God to completely be in them. I pray that God will reveal His great love and power to them as an extra boost of faith so that we can be refreshed and continuously just surrender ourselves. I know it's hard but we need it. What else are we going to turn to? Or better yet what else would we want to turn to? Than this compassionate BIG Good Lord? If we delight in Him, He will give us the desires of our heart. Psalm 37:4. I pray for Brian, Robyn, Matt, Chris, my family and everyone who God already knows needs Him more right now. Let's surrender it all to Him.
I just experienced a physical pain so great that I haven't felt in a long time that completely turned my day upside down. I was having a fine day getting excited about having the chance to give blood finally. But I think I was focusing too much on myself being seen and being recognized by others that I was helping others. Which I probably shouldn't have. I should've just done it to do it to really really care for others and the lives I could save, not that I didn't but for some reason I think I thought more of making myself feel good for knowing I did it. But yeah God took over I feel like and of course, I didn't react well to the giving of my blood, lots of blood btw. I looked at it! Bad idea. But I got so nauseated! And dizzy and lightheaded. And then of course, got him with some of the worst stomach cramps of my life!!!!!! Basically I felt like a big baby in front of everyone and had to get special attention and care and ended up being stranded at laplata hall for like 3 hours! I missed the last images meeting that we were leading for this semester and our fundraiser!! Shows how much I'm just not in charge of my world. I'm a lot better now trying to relax and recover. The pain was so bad all at once and I couldn't understand feeling that much pain for doing a good thing that I was angry and muttered some curse words as well. my bad, sorry God. But afterwards and after I felt better, I knew that I would do it all again to just save lives and be given that chance to help others. Weird blood giving experience, i'll give you that. Lol.
Oh God, thanks for being more than enough for me, even if i dont remember that all the time. But when I do and I am filled with You, thank You for letting me share You with others. And just desire You more and more. Just USE ME GOD all the time, anytime! I don't find anything better than to be Used by you. You are soo great and I love you Lord. I can't to retreat away this weekend and just be with Youuuuuu with my brothers and sisters.
Rest world, don't forget to rest.
love love love you all.
whoever you are out there.
No matter how hard things get,
how much we don't understand,
how much we want to give up at time,
how exhausted we become day to day,
or even how happy and excited we are,
or how much we want to praise and thank you,
God, i could not live day to day without my eyes on you.
Spring break was amazing. I was able to go on BigBreak with Campus Crusade for Christ again this year but this year I really felt the Holy Spirit fill me up and desired it so bad. Salisbury and UMD Cru loves really, I thank you all, I thank you for loving me honestly and completely. And I thank you all for the best time of my life just falling more deeply in love with the Lord our father, worshipping my heart out and letting God fill me up and just sharing God's love with others with me. It was lifechanging and I can't wait for this change to be brought back to our campus and this love, which I already feel is happening!! And I've met so many Christian friends that I am just so in love with them and their love for YOU.
I don't know why I don't feel all the time that You are more than enough for me. When I really do believe it all the time. Sometimes I really do have to rely on my faith more than my emotions. And that's really tough. But I know I could not live without You to trust in.
Thank You God for my new found sheep friends,
I praise Your power and Your love for also letting me help bring them back to You.
For using me to invest into their lives and just completely love them.
God, I thank You for Brian and Robyn in my life and for the encouragement and hope You have given me through these past weeks. Thank You for giving me a purpose and a passion to serve You and share Your love with others and everyone.
"When we become Christians, it's not that we begin to worshipl it's that we restore worship to its original design. We reboot our lives with the process of being saturated with God." Rick James
I'm reading fantasy right now, bits and pieces to just fill me up with God. I need it so bad all the time, to be filled up. He is the best thing to be saturated with. Better than fear, worry, greed, activity, lust, emptiness, loneliness, or even alcohol. says Rick and I agree.
Worship means "saturation'.
Being saturate with the presence of God, we overflow back to God
in praise, service, thanksgiving, singing, loving, caring, time, so on...
Us pouring ourselves into God and Him pouring Himself back into us-He refills us.
And basically like a sponge, if we fill ourselves up, we're just going to overflow!
That's what God wants. :)
Today, I want to pray especially and lift up all those who are having trouble being filled with God and the Holy Spirit, who are being tested or attacked by Satan, and just everyone in need of God to completely be in them. I pray that God will reveal His great love and power to them as an extra boost of faith so that we can be refreshed and continuously just surrender ourselves. I know it's hard but we need it. What else are we going to turn to? Or better yet what else would we want to turn to? Than this compassionate BIG Good Lord? If we delight in Him, He will give us the desires of our heart. Psalm 37:4. I pray for Brian, Robyn, Matt, Chris, my family and everyone who God already knows needs Him more right now. Let's surrender it all to Him.
I just experienced a physical pain so great that I haven't felt in a long time that completely turned my day upside down. I was having a fine day getting excited about having the chance to give blood finally. But I think I was focusing too much on myself being seen and being recognized by others that I was helping others. Which I probably shouldn't have. I should've just done it to do it to really really care for others and the lives I could save, not that I didn't but for some reason I think I thought more of making myself feel good for knowing I did it. But yeah God took over I feel like and of course, I didn't react well to the giving of my blood, lots of blood btw. I looked at it! Bad idea. But I got so nauseated! And dizzy and lightheaded. And then of course, got him with some of the worst stomach cramps of my life!!!!!! Basically I felt like a big baby in front of everyone and had to get special attention and care and ended up being stranded at laplata hall for like 3 hours! I missed the last images meeting that we were leading for this semester and our fundraiser!! Shows how much I'm just not in charge of my world. I'm a lot better now trying to relax and recover. The pain was so bad all at once and I couldn't understand feeling that much pain for doing a good thing that I was angry and muttered some curse words as well. my bad, sorry God. But afterwards and after I felt better, I knew that I would do it all again to just save lives and be given that chance to help others. Weird blood giving experience, i'll give you that. Lol.
Oh God, thanks for being more than enough for me, even if i dont remember that all the time. But when I do and I am filled with You, thank You for letting me share You with others. And just desire You more and more. Just USE ME GOD all the time, anytime! I don't find anything better than to be Used by you. You are soo great and I love you Lord. I can't to retreat away this weekend and just be with Youuuuuu with my brothers and sisters.
Rest world, don't forget to rest.
love love love you all.
whoever you are out there.
Monday, February 23, 2009
Blessed Night
Tonight, I reaped from God's love for me.
This is an e-mail I sent my campus ministry leader a bit ago tonight...
"=) . Thank you for your email at the most perfect time.
I was waiting for one back but then when i got the facebook message just figured that was it.
Can I just share with you how blessed I feel tonight? And amazed and in love with God?
(I don't know how I'm so open, especially in these e-mails, I just thank you for actually reading them and letting me be open.)
I just had a Bible study with Erin, one of my roomies from last year, and Brian and Rick! =) Brian, Nina (my other roomie from last year) and I got together to do Bible in an hour with Rick 2 weeks ago. Then we decided to meet every monday. Nina hasn't come since because she says she is scared of talking about her feelings. Tonight, I invited Erin on a whim and she wanted to come! Erin wants to come back to hang out with us next monday too! And also, tonight Kelly called me and she was really upset about her parents telling her over and over again that cru has been brainwashing her. So, i got to pray for her on the phone and talk to her for a little bit. I actually got to say before we hung up, "Can I pray for you Kelly?" Then i get your email about being able to go to big break with what little money I have to hold. And then I think about how I'm going to be roommates with Abby next year!!! And I feel so blessed right now. =)
I'm just going to keep praying about life. =)
Have a great night Ryan, I'm going to register now! I can't wait!!
Thank you for having faith that God will provide no matter what. It encourages me to do the same.
Christina"
Thank you to those who have invested in me and others or anyone!
I am so grateful.
Tracy, my discipler once told me, "It will get easier, I promise"
And I never couldve imagined believing her.
I now do. =)
Goodnight world.
This is an e-mail I sent my campus ministry leader a bit ago tonight...
"=) . Thank you for your email at the most perfect time.
I was waiting for one back but then when i got the facebook message just figured that was it.
Can I just share with you how blessed I feel tonight? And amazed and in love with God?
(I don't know how I'm so open, especially in these e-mails, I just thank you for actually reading them and letting me be open.)
I just had a Bible study with Erin, one of my roomies from last year, and Brian and Rick! =) Brian, Nina (my other roomie from last year) and I got together to do Bible in an hour with Rick 2 weeks ago. Then we decided to meet every monday. Nina hasn't come since because she says she is scared of talking about her feelings. Tonight, I invited Erin on a whim and she wanted to come! Erin wants to come back to hang out with us next monday too! And also, tonight Kelly called me and she was really upset about her parents telling her over and over again that cru has been brainwashing her. So, i got to pray for her on the phone and talk to her for a little bit. I actually got to say before we hung up, "Can I pray for you Kelly?" Then i get your email about being able to go to big break with what little money I have to hold. And then I think about how I'm going to be roommates with Abby next year!!! And I feel so blessed right now. =)
I'm just going to keep praying about life. =)
Have a great night Ryan, I'm going to register now! I can't wait!!
Thank you for having faith that God will provide no matter what. It encourages me to do the same.
Christina"
Thank you to those who have invested in me and others or anyone!
I am so grateful.
Tracy, my discipler once told me, "It will get easier, I promise"
And I never couldve imagined believing her.
I now do. =)
Goodnight world.
Saturday, February 21, 2009
Weary and Burdened
"Come to me, all of you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." Matthew 11:28-30
I just had a wonderful day with best friends and then what happened?
My mom called me and told me about what's going on at home, and all the stress she's handling and then I just yell at her that I can't handle that. I can't believe I let go and just burst. I tried so hard to just listen and support but I couldn't any longer. It's uncontrollable because all I can think is that I am going through enough stuff on my own that anything on top of it is just too tough. And especially when its more and more hard times at home. It's like it never ends. And when it's so far away I feel more like I can do NOTHING and that I can't just work harder or try harder. I don't know what I can do to help except tell my mom to look to the Bible for love and promises from God. But she says to me that she does not want to. Because everything is just downhill all the time, one after another.
Today, the couch from our living room in our house in Baltimore was taken away. Our for sale sign is up and i think it's just hitting my sis and my parents strong because they are living there, or at least seeing it. We all don't hear from my brother, but I told my mom to ask him if he was doing okay in school. students first? or money? and work? or family? It's not as easy as it seems, but it should be right? Why are we so burdened??
What do I think I'm burdened with? I am tired of living my life for myself, it's not really mine to live, so it should be easy. Just live for God. So, why is it hard?? I spend my time trying to find my true friends and act as a witness of Jesus' love but most of all to just really love everyone. Is that so hard? It definitely shouldn't be. But I struggle still with being self-conscious about what I do or don't do, whether I'm in or out, whether I drink or not, and where I go. I don't keep in touch with my family as well and even though I've thought about devoting more time to reading the Word and just listening to God to find out what he wants for our lives in His plan, I can't seem to do it. Constantly I feel like I have to explain myself, which I like to do I because I share my beliefs and ultimately my new life or lifestyle with others who are missing out on God's love. But shouldn't that mean when I lean on God and use Him as my crutch and realize my weaknesses that my burdens should be lightened?? Maybe the answer is just simply living more of my life for Him and that there is still more to give up control of.
I love my family, I do. And I know God has brought these obstacles to us for a reason, this is our chance to bring us all together stronger than ever, and more in each others lives. If we don't do that during the toughest times, when will we? We're still not done, maybe that's why. It should not be hard being a student and learning about the wonders of life created by God, it shouldn't be hard hanging out with friends and sharing a life with others. Nothing is meant to be hard.
I'm signing a lease early this upcoming week to live in a beautiful spacious house with cheap rent with other Christians. I am so thankful for this because it is all i've been praying for. I prob. should have been praying for a lot more in life. But being able to be in an environment where I can grow closer to God rather than be challenged and pulled at every second at home is what I desire and need for next year. When my friend decided that it was too far from the shuttle busses for the weekend bar scene, I questioned it and thought about how I hadn't thought about that. But then I did. And I pray to God that I don't see that as a disadvantage but maybe even a plus. Thank you God.
Being around others who come between God and I are hard. I know you are suppose to stay away from that but how else can I invest in others and just love on them?? Like Jesus loves everyone. God, please take away my heavy burdens as well as my loved ones and everyone who is struggling. And lighten our load as we come to You (more)...
Thank you for being our ALMIGHTY.
Love, Your follower.
I just had a wonderful day with best friends and then what happened?
My mom called me and told me about what's going on at home, and all the stress she's handling and then I just yell at her that I can't handle that. I can't believe I let go and just burst. I tried so hard to just listen and support but I couldn't any longer. It's uncontrollable because all I can think is that I am going through enough stuff on my own that anything on top of it is just too tough. And especially when its more and more hard times at home. It's like it never ends. And when it's so far away I feel more like I can do NOTHING and that I can't just work harder or try harder. I don't know what I can do to help except tell my mom to look to the Bible for love and promises from God. But she says to me that she does not want to. Because everything is just downhill all the time, one after another.
Today, the couch from our living room in our house in Baltimore was taken away. Our for sale sign is up and i think it's just hitting my sis and my parents strong because they are living there, or at least seeing it. We all don't hear from my brother, but I told my mom to ask him if he was doing okay in school. students first? or money? and work? or family? It's not as easy as it seems, but it should be right? Why are we so burdened??
What do I think I'm burdened with? I am tired of living my life for myself, it's not really mine to live, so it should be easy. Just live for God. So, why is it hard?? I spend my time trying to find my true friends and act as a witness of Jesus' love but most of all to just really love everyone. Is that so hard? It definitely shouldn't be. But I struggle still with being self-conscious about what I do or don't do, whether I'm in or out, whether I drink or not, and where I go. I don't keep in touch with my family as well and even though I've thought about devoting more time to reading the Word and just listening to God to find out what he wants for our lives in His plan, I can't seem to do it. Constantly I feel like I have to explain myself, which I like to do I because I share my beliefs and ultimately my new life or lifestyle with others who are missing out on God's love. But shouldn't that mean when I lean on God and use Him as my crutch and realize my weaknesses that my burdens should be lightened?? Maybe the answer is just simply living more of my life for Him and that there is still more to give up control of.
I love my family, I do. And I know God has brought these obstacles to us for a reason, this is our chance to bring us all together stronger than ever, and more in each others lives. If we don't do that during the toughest times, when will we? We're still not done, maybe that's why. It should not be hard being a student and learning about the wonders of life created by God, it shouldn't be hard hanging out with friends and sharing a life with others. Nothing is meant to be hard.
I'm signing a lease early this upcoming week to live in a beautiful spacious house with cheap rent with other Christians. I am so thankful for this because it is all i've been praying for. I prob. should have been praying for a lot more in life. But being able to be in an environment where I can grow closer to God rather than be challenged and pulled at every second at home is what I desire and need for next year. When my friend decided that it was too far from the shuttle busses for the weekend bar scene, I questioned it and thought about how I hadn't thought about that. But then I did. And I pray to God that I don't see that as a disadvantage but maybe even a plus. Thank you God.
Being around others who come between God and I are hard. I know you are suppose to stay away from that but how else can I invest in others and just love on them?? Like Jesus loves everyone. God, please take away my heavy burdens as well as my loved ones and everyone who is struggling. And lighten our load as we come to You (more)...
Thank you for being our ALMIGHTY.
Love, Your follower.
Thursday, January 15, 2009
happiness
I feel so happy.
I don't know why today especially but I hope I can reach this happiness any day I want to.
Today wasn't even that extremely special. But it was fun, def. a good day. =)
"She is just always smiling! always happy!" -my manager
"Thanks, I try."
You really do have to try at happiness, I've learned.
Cause it's not just going to land on your lap. As my mom thinks it should, or else you'll think you are unlucky for things, like she does. But I don't think that is the way God planned it.
I'm so thankful and grateful for the love in my family that we've never shared like we do now. Even though we still yell and aren't perfect at all. And for my friends who are there for me in my life and just have fun with me and we love each other. And for the best cutest cousins ever that I get to love and spend time with and my grandparents. Just everyone. Thanks Brian, Jenny, Jina for spending time with me today at the store, meant so much =)
But life feels different. I kept saying recently that I hated that things will never be the same again but in the end i feel like it will be so much better. The way its supposed to be, i hope. I feel like putting God in my everyday life so completely like I'm trying and kind of letting happen and desiring to happen changes everything. I get to share what I know about Him so far and His love in a surprising but awesome bible study with my mom and sis today, at work with friends, with my grandparents, so openly with my brother, and even my little cousins. It is amazing. And today, i dont know about tomorrow, but today more than ever I know who I am and who I want to be and who God is calling me to be right now in this life and I enjoy it. Am i being too deep or not deep? IDK. Oh well, this is my blog. I can say how i feel. Like it or not, it's meeeeeeee.
One week til schoolllllllllll, oh bbbbbbbboy.
Moving everything out of my room is going to be unimaginable at this moment. lol.
LOVE,
x.
I don't know why today especially but I hope I can reach this happiness any day I want to.
Today wasn't even that extremely special. But it was fun, def. a good day. =)
"She is just always smiling! always happy!" -my manager
"Thanks, I try."
You really do have to try at happiness, I've learned.
Cause it's not just going to land on your lap. As my mom thinks it should, or else you'll think you are unlucky for things, like she does. But I don't think that is the way God planned it.
I'm so thankful and grateful for the love in my family that we've never shared like we do now. Even though we still yell and aren't perfect at all. And for my friends who are there for me in my life and just have fun with me and we love each other. And for the best cutest cousins ever that I get to love and spend time with and my grandparents. Just everyone. Thanks Brian, Jenny, Jina for spending time with me today at the store, meant so much =)
But life feels different. I kept saying recently that I hated that things will never be the same again but in the end i feel like it will be so much better. The way its supposed to be, i hope. I feel like putting God in my everyday life so completely like I'm trying and kind of letting happen and desiring to happen changes everything. I get to share what I know about Him so far and His love in a surprising but awesome bible study with my mom and sis today, at work with friends, with my grandparents, so openly with my brother, and even my little cousins. It is amazing. And today, i dont know about tomorrow, but today more than ever I know who I am and who I want to be and who God is calling me to be right now in this life and I enjoy it. Am i being too deep or not deep? IDK. Oh well, this is my blog. I can say how i feel. Like it or not, it's meeeeeeee.
One week til schoolllllllllll, oh bbbbbbbboy.
Moving everything out of my room is going to be unimaginable at this moment. lol.
LOVE,
x.
Monday, January 12, 2009
Barenaked in 2009!
So, it's a new year! And the perfect time to start a new blog, i believe.
People always say to each other that they're not mindreaders even though we may secretly sometimes wish for others to read our minds and know what we're thinking without saying it. But since we can't and it's hard for us to keep up with each other's lives or even our own lives. I'm going to share my thoughts here from time to time with myself and whoever else wants in.
I just had dejavu. haha, weird. So, i don't know if i'll actually keep up with this but my journal is filling up to its last bunches of pages and my family is spreading apart to our own worlds and school is getting ready to start up again in 2 weeks and i'm going to be away from some of my friends again and i will no longer live in fawn spring ct. so it's blogging time.
For now, I just want to say...
"Tough times never last but tough people do"
Thank you God for giving me such a tough family.
Sometimes I never feel tough enough but I think it's because of the tough people I have to compare myself to. And in tough times like these days, we always tell ourselves to trust in God, and I just know we have to do that completely.
Lord, there is nothing that can happen to me today that you and I can't handle together.
And there's my first post of my new blog!
Christina
People always say to each other that they're not mindreaders even though we may secretly sometimes wish for others to read our minds and know what we're thinking without saying it. But since we can't and it's hard for us to keep up with each other's lives or even our own lives. I'm going to share my thoughts here from time to time with myself and whoever else wants in.
I just had dejavu. haha, weird. So, i don't know if i'll actually keep up with this but my journal is filling up to its last bunches of pages and my family is spreading apart to our own worlds and school is getting ready to start up again in 2 weeks and i'm going to be away from some of my friends again and i will no longer live in fawn spring ct. so it's blogging time.
For now, I just want to say...
"Tough times never last but tough people do"
Thank you God for giving me such a tough family.
Sometimes I never feel tough enough but I think it's because of the tough people I have to compare myself to. And in tough times like these days, we always tell ourselves to trust in God, and I just know we have to do that completely.
Lord, there is nothing that can happen to me today that you and I can't handle together.
And there's my first post of my new blog!
Christina
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